


i'll keep you folded here in my ribcage

by cinnahearts



Series: Jupeter Week 2019 [2]
Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: Flashbacks, Gen, Jupeter Week 2019, M/M, Pining, well this is kind of a mix of s1 and s2 but the main point of ficus is from s1 so LETS GO, yall motherfucks want season 1 WELL ILL GIVE YOU SEASON 1
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-16
Updated: 2019-07-16
Packaged: 2020-06-29 17:47:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19835386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cinnahearts/pseuds/cinnahearts
Summary: A brief reflection on Juno's (and my) favorite gift from Peter, because holy shit you don't just call yourself the better half of someone who tried to have you arrested I HAVE QUESTIONS MR. NUREYEV(written for jupeter week- day 2: season 1)





	i'll keep you folded here in my ribcage

Juno kept Peter's note. 

Part of him was embarrassed about it, it's not like that night was ever going to lead to anything else, and even if it did, who was to say that Rex or Peter or whoever he was would even be there in the morning. 

But, yeah, he kept the note. 

It got old and yellowed from staying in his pocket all the time. The paper had begun to crease from being folded and unfolded and hastily shoved under paperwork away from the prying eyes of nosy secretaries with nothing better to do during their lunch breaks than go through their boss's things

There's a spot of water in the bottom right-hand corner, nearly eclipsing the swooping curve of the V that finishes Nureyev's name. Juno can't remember whether it was tears or whiskey that made its way there, and correctly deduces that its probably a mixture of both.

The note still smells like Peter, faint and woodsy and something that feels like home. Juno misses the body that came with that smell, misses drinking it up whenever Peter came around and mentally screams at himself for not being greedier. All he has now is a scrap of paper, and even that won't last forever.

Nothing good ever did, not around him. 

He remembers when he'd been a lesser lady, dug it up from between his couch cushions, patchouli wafting from the paper as he held it up to his face. Juno remembers not wanting any piece of the thief left behind, tossing it into the wastebasket near his kitchen after seeing Peter on the security comms where he'd said he'd be. The Juno from that lifetime had had enough of Peter Nureyev for almost the rest of his days;

And he remembers being drunk at 3:23 in the morning, stumbling from his bed and Miasma's tentacles brushing at the margins of his mind. Juno remembers shaking hands practically dumping out the basket, thankful for the fact that he almost never cleaned up. The note sat on top of old bill envelopes and eviction notices that were never followed up, practically glowing in the moonlight. 

Juno had pressed the note to his chest, hoped that Nureyev could feel his heartbeat light-years away, whatever planet he was on and with whoever he was giving his love to now, and he cried. God, what Juno wouldn't _give_ to have Peter back.

He'd almost lost the note, trudging through the sewers with Alessandra. Pilot had snatched it from his hands while Juno was running his fingers across it for reassurance. Juno felt his heart sink into his toes and almost cried when he yelled for it back like an impatient child. The world had already taken his brother, his eye, his sanity. He wouldn't let it have Peter too. 

The note had gotten gritty from Martian sand, seeping into the crevices as Juno ran his eyes over the words over and over again, ignoring the insistent cries of the THEIA Soul to find some type of shelter and begging it to just _ let him have this _ . 

Juno didn't touch the note all through his journey with Brown Jacket. It wasn't there when he was with Ben, too focused on solving the unsolvable to reach for it. 

And then, finally, he did, seeing Buddy and Vespa reunite in the light of the setting sun. Maybe, just maybe, if they had found their way back to each other, he could find it in himself to see Peter again. 

Maybe Peter really was his better half, seeing through hardened layers of snark and glares to what truly laid within, cradling the heart of someone who probably didn't deserve it, with the utmost care. He can almost feel Nureyev's fingers curling around his own, deft and long and bumpy knuckles and the crookedness of his left pointer finger that left a little indent on his middle finger. He can just imagine Peter writing this note, pen scritching across the paper in a way that slightly bordered on being illegible while maintaining some sort of cursive semblance.

Juno wants to hold those hands in his own and apologize, feel those fingers run across his sides and really mean it. 

He misses Peter Nureyev with something fierce, and one day, that small scrap of paper isn't going to cut it anymore. 

And Juno knows he'll be alive to see it, feel it, to taste it on his tongue, even if it kills him. 

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> yeah. uh sorry not sorry? yeah... i got dumped during the time period it took me to write this and i kinda just put all the sadness i had into this whoopsies but HEY good fic! sorry its so short but i felt like something too long wouldn't have done this idea justice
> 
> my tumblr is huaslian is you wanna say hi!
> 
> kudos + comments are appreciated! <3


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